March/April 2001

Which Way to School

by Barbara Curtis

With 11 children educated at home, in public school, Christian school, Catholic school, special education and independent study programs, I've been making choices-and learning to make the most of these choices-for twenty-some years.

Tom and I really need to decide about school," Jennifer sighed as our four-year-olds took turns on the slide and we took turns bouncing Jen's new baby. "We've been discussing it since Megan started walking, but we still don't have the perfect answer. I like the idea of Christian school, but the closest one is half an hour away. We've got a brand new elementary school within walking distance, but I hear so many negatives about the public system. Homeschooling is an option, but I'm not sure I could be a good teacher-and I wouldn't even know where to start.

"It's such an important decision-and we really don't want to blow it. But how do we figure out what's best for Megan-and for our family?"

Jennifer and Tom were just where they should be, and I told her so-gathering information, asking others who'd been down this road before.

I had certainly been down this road a few times. With 11 children educated at home, in public school, Christian school, Catholic school, special education and independent study programs, I've been making choices -- and learning to make the most of these choices -- for twenty-some years.

That's why I knew that Jennifer was starting with the perfect question. It's the question I pray over each year for each of my children as they continue their education.

"What best for Joshua -- and Benjamin and Zachary and Madeleine and."

Time to Decide

Megan's parents still have a year and a half to go. But if your child is five or older, you need to be making your decision now. While public school welcomes new students at any time, it's wise to enroll your kindergartner well in advance. Private schools -- many with waiting lists -- begin enrollment in the spring. Families beginning homeschool need time to choose and order curriculum.

For still-undecided parents, here is a brief look at the upside and downside of each option, along with tips for making the most of your choice -- wherever it takes you.

Public School -- Upside

"Our family's experience, while not always smooth, has been very positive," says Robin, whose three children have attended public schools since they were little. Her oldest son, who will graduate this year, qualified to attend a major university.

"We couldn't have afforded anything else, and my work [administrator of a crisis pregnancy center] wouldn't allow me to homeschool."

Public schools are convenient, close and free. Teachers have been trained to meet specific certification requirements. Class size is regulated and relatively small. There is often a marvelous diversity among the students, with an emphasis on acceptance of others as individuals. Because public schools tend to be larger than private, they can offer a broader curriculum and more extracurricular activities ("The sports program is very important to my boys," says Robin).

Children who need transportation may qualify for bus service. To accommodate working parents, many schools have on-site daycare programs before and after school. Students in some circumstances may qualify for free lunches. The elementary school my children attended for two years gave them everything they needed -- including paper, pencils and art supplies.

And, much to their credit, public schools go to great lengths (as required by federal law) to meet the needs of children with disabilities, providing speech therapy and other specialized services to help them meet their potential.

"In public school, we were able to get the proper diagnosis for Heather's learning disabilities and tailor a program which would help her succeed. I'm grateful for that," Robin reports.

Robin's son, Matt, a class of 2000 graduate, says that although his faith was challenged a few times, it was never for long. "I think my faith is actually stronger -- strong enough to face the challenges of college. If you've never been tested, you really don't know how committed you are."

Public School -- Downside

Having children in public school actually requires a lot from parents who want to do the job right.

It isn't simply a matter of dropping them off and picking them up. For starters, be prepared to work with your kids in the evenings.

"I hate homework," my friend Susan says, more adamant now as a mom than ever before. "I pick the kids up at 3 p.m. Then there's Little League or ballet, dinner, and clean-up. By 7:30 I'm worn out. And then the kids pull out all this homework! Makes me wonder what they're doing all day in school!"

Sometimes not as much as we might wish. Public schools, targeted for inclusiveness, teach to the average student or below -- and the average drops as parents seeking more bring their children home or put them in private school. Expectations for discipline are often lower than they could be, resulting in wasted classroom time.

Some children attend schools where inadequate funding, unsafe facilities or threats of violence may interfere with the learning process.

The "learning centers" sprouting up in malls, along with ads for home phonics programs are testimony that more and more parents are finding it necessary to supplement their children's public education with special tutoring programs -- at expense.

But even more worrisome than how much or how well public students learn, is what they are learning. The elimination of public school prayer in 1963 signaled the beginning of a concerted effort to remove all Christian influence from public schools. The results are in: history books which downplay the Christian heritage of our country, science books which present the theory of evolution as fact and literature laced with spiritual nuggets from Native American, New Age and even Wicca (witchcraft) traditions -- anything but the Bible.

Then there is the negative influence of peers from homes whose values may not remotely resemble your own. Children in public school, especially but not exclusively in the higher grades, are exposed to foul language, corrupt thinking and the worst excesses of our culture -- many of the things we would all like to shield them from as long as possible.

Making the Most of It

While generalizations about trends in public education are valid, you may live near a school that is more compatible with your family's values than most. Because of work schedules or finances, public school may be your only option. Then there is the God factor (see sidebar).

Parents opting for public school, for whatever reason, need to safeguard their children's faith by counteracting some of the influences in public school. Supplement your child's curriculum with a history book published by a Christian press or published before 1965. Set aside time for daily devotions and Bible reading. Discuss issues that come up in the classroom. Teach your child to discern.

Christian families in public schools also need to work to build sincere, respectful relationships with the principal, teachers and other parents. Volunteer in the classroom as much as possible. Review the sex education materials and sign your child out if they are offensive. Be familiar with current law protecting free speech in schools. Then when you notice that the upcoming "winter program" lacks Christmas carols, you can explain to the principal -- as I once did -- why it is legal to sing about Jesus' birth when other religions are also represented. The goal of multiculturalism can work for us, too!

If these issues seem like a long way off because your child is just entering kindergarten, keep in mind that a child who eventually transfers from public to private school may be behind academically. A child who shifts to homeschool can quickly make up the difference, however.

Private School -- Upside

"I'm so grateful Timmy's in a good Christian school," Samantha told me after the first of her four sons finished kindergarten. "Even with a class of twenty-eight, his teacher had them reading by the end of the year. And I know I can trust what he's learning."

For parents worried about their children's spiritual welfare and their own ability to prevail against the public school agenda, finding a good Christian school may feel like heaven on earth. Browsing through the textbooks, parents will be reassured their children's faith is being strengthened as they study subjects in the context of God's creation. Parents who were themselves educated in public school may learn a few new things as well!

Samantha also appreciates how Tim's school has reinforced the good behavior she has tried to instill in him from the start.

Private schools are long on discipline. In the balcony with my own children at the San Francisco Symphony's school concerts, I found it easy to pick out the rows filled by private schools. In uniform or not, the children knew how to sit and talk quietly with one another, while just behind, kids would be popping out of their seats like popcorn.

A former tour guide at Mrs. Grossman's Sticker Company says she could spot private school kids (and homeschooled too) just by the way they came in the door. "They seem so much more considerate, and they listen so well. It's always a pleasure to give them the tour."

Perhaps it's because private schools are more concerned with educating the whole child, not just the mind and body. They're not afraid to take a stand. Rather than moral relativism, parents sending children to Christian schools will find a worldview which seeks God's wisdom regarding the cultural and the individual.

And because a Christian school has this foundation, in addition to a safer environment, it can also offer families a smaller community of like-minded people with whom to form bonds -- bonds which will weave a safety-net for children as they stream into the larger worlds of high school and college.

Private Schools -- Downside

The often superior education offered by private schools does come with a cost. Monthly tuition is just a beginning. There are usually requirements for parental involvement -- a certain number of volunteer hours, fund-raising duties, scrip quotas.

The relatively small size of private schools -- especially in upper grades -- usually means they cannot match the range of public school subjects or extracurricular offerings. They may not have much of a sports, music or art program. And they almost always suffer from a lack of diversity.

As a result, the thinking within a private school may become narrow and provincial. The administration and staff may tend to overlook

opportunities to broaden their own horizons. For instance, not many private schools will accept a child with disabilities. Who could measure the discouragement this brings to those who can't attend school with their "normal" siblings? Or the prejudice it causes in children who never have an opportunity to get to know a kid with handicaps?

Children in private school may become too sheltered from the world, thus more vulnerable when they make the transition (which they must at some time) into the "real" world.

And in their education, there may occasionally be an absence of professionalism. Because private school teachers are not subject to certification requirements, or because their pay is lower, some may lack skills or be truly unqualified to teach.

Christian schools too closely associated with a particular church or denomination may be intolerant of doctrinal differences or may be prone to cliquishness in children of church members.

Making the Most of It

If your child is enrolled in a school with a compatible worldview, you'll be able to relax a little. You won't need to be as vigilant in overseeing curriculum, and you will probably enjoy the benefits of better discipline. You will need to oversee your child's homework -- and there will probably be plenty -- unless he works well independently.

You can compensate for a lack of diversity or broader vision by supplying the missing elements yourself. Take your child to the public library, museums, playgrounds. Enroll him in community classes where he will come in contact with other kinds of children under your watchful eye. Help him make friends who may be a little different -- invite his Sunday School classmate with Downs syndrome over for lunch sometime.

Keep on the lookout for visitors and programs to bring into the school, or special field trips which will broaden everyone's horizons. Don't forget to volunteer in the classroom and to drive on field trips. Get to know your child's classmates and their parents. Build a rapport with all the teachers so they are aware of your child as he progresses. Your whole family will benefit from your involvement in the life of the school.

Homeschool -- Upside

"The most wonderful thing about homeschool for me is getting to spend so much time with my kids," says one seven-year veteran and mother of five. Mimi echoes the sentiments of many who have found that homeschooling strengthens the bond between parents and their children and among siblings as well.

That's icing on the cake for parents who have taken on the task of teaching -- though they would be quick to note that every parent starts out as a teacher. Viewed in this light, homeschooling flows naturally out of the child's early learning at home -- a more natural process than the abrupt shift to four hours daily in an institutional setting, in a room with a large number of children born the same year.

In a classroom each child must conform to the curriculum, but at home the curriculum can conform to the child. No stress from work above his level nor frustration from work below. Parents can choose what's best for each child and pace it according to her needs. The Internet has proven an invaluable resource in keeping homeschooling families up-to-date on curriculum.

At home, children cover the core curriculum in half the time necessary in school -- not to mention no homework! This means more time for field trips, art, music and dance, classic literature, good movies and sports. More time to learn to cook, to help with household chores and to just hang out and be a kid.

Then there are the results. Studies show homeschoolers' standardized achievement test scores average between 80 and 87 percent -- far above the 50 percent of public school. And results are the same whether the parents are certified teachers or never attended college.

This may be because homeschooled children, with one-on-one attention, learn to read faster and better than in a classroom setting. And once they can read, they're more engaged in self-instruction and less teacher-dependent. Homeschoolers have now been accepted at 900 colleges and universities, including Yale, Harvard, M.I.T. and the military academies.

Homeschool -- Downside

Homeschooling demands a major time commitment and is not appropriate when parents' work would leave children alone for much of the day. Aside from teaching time, parents need time to review curriculum, plan lessons and check their child's progress. They also need the get-up-and-go to put together meaningful field trips and social activities for their children.

The benefits for children of social interaction are important, and parents need to take this into consideration as they weigh the pros and cons of homeschooling. Those inclined to be homebodies or loners will need to extend themselves at least enough to meet other parents and form relationships which will lead to children's get-togethers and playtimes.

Some expense is required, though significantly less than private school. Homeschooling requires good organizational skills -- or the willingness to develop them. Actually, willingness to change is essential -- to become the best teachers they can be, parents need to stretch to overcome their own likes, dislikes and academic weaknesses.

Making the Most of It

With an estimated 1.5 million children currently educated at home, homeschooling families have an abundance of curriculum and resources to choose from. To get your bearings, start with Mary Pride's Big Book of Home Learning (Crossway, 1998) which reviews just about everything. You might start by purchasing a complete curriculum package. Later, as you become familiar with publishers, you may decide to pick your own favorites in different subject areas.

"When I first decided to homeschool, I was overwhelmed. I didn't know whether I could even teach my girls, let alone know what books to use," Suzanna says. She opted to enroll her daughters in an independent study program through her local public school system. Each met with a teacher once a week to receive assignments and review the previous week's work, then did their work at home with mom's help when needed. After a couple years, Suzanna had the confidence to take on the curriculum and assignments herself.

Some public schools have developed a more give-and-take attitude towards homeschoolers. Even if you are homeschooling completely on your own, your children may be welcome to participate in band, drama or sports. Keep your local school in mind as a resource.

And there are so many resources out there! A day in a museum -- art, science or history -- can be a great source of inspiration, note-taking, report-writing and family discussion. Take your children to workplaces where they can see how things are made. Our most memorable field trips include a post office, a jelly bean factory, an automobile factory and a cooperage where strong men pounded out handmade barrels every day.

Many people see homeschooling families as isolated, but my own experience and that of families I've known is just the opposite. In local groups, parents plan field trips, science fairs, speech meets, art exhibits and social events. Groups of parents often hire a teacher for a special series in art, drama, singing or creative writing. Most homeschooling families are involved in their communities in sports, 4H or newspaper routes. If you plan to homeschool, get involved with your local group -- or start your own.

How to Decide

One thing is certain -- when it comes to your child's education, there is no "perfect" answer, only the perfect question: What's best for our child and our family?

Public school, private school, homeschool -- whichever you choose, remember your child's education is not limited to a particular time or place. No matter where your child learns, you can broaden his horizons by helping him connect with and explore the wider world.

The real key to your child's school success is your commitment, so plan on staying involved. No matter what you choose, you will always be his most important teacher! 

Three-time Amy Award winning writer, Barbara Curtis has written more than 400 articles for 50 magazines with an emphasis on current cultural problems.

The God Factor With eleven children, plus all-over-the-map school experience, I've met many moms and dads. In public schools, private schools and homeschooling groups, I've found hundreds of parents who want the best for their children. But occasionally I meet parents who are sure that what's best for their children must be best for everyone else. I had a similar attitude when I began homeschooling nine years ago. On meeting a mother whose six children were scattered between a Christian school and homeschool, I found myself fuming, "Why doesn't she just homeschool them all?" As if it were any of my business. With years, I mellowed. I began to understand that each of us has plenty to do keeping up with our own children's needs without worrying about everyone else's. For those contemplating teaching at home, rest assured that homeschool is not a 12-year commitment, but an option you are free to move into and out of, depending on your needs. When our mostly-homeschooled family moved to a rural area three years ago, we found our local public school was not only wonderfully traditional, but so stable that the first grade teacher was herself a graduate, and the kindergarten teacher was teaching sons and daughters of former students! It was clearly the social hub of the community. Since we wanted to meet people and feel connected, we enrolled a few of our children. How could I explain this decision to someone convinced their way is the only way? Only by what I call the "God Factor." It is, after all, his prerogative to have us do things we don't always understand. For those still sitting on the fence, keep gathering information -- and don't forget to pray.

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