Question: Hi Greg,

I haven’t found any questions that are similar to the question I have. What do you feel is the biblical way to handle family members that are living their lives controlled by the flesh and/or under the yoke of gambling, drinking, gossip, etc.? What are we or are we not called to do? Since they are not trying to live their lives for Jesus do we have an obligation to hold them accountable and try to lead them in that direction by words rather than only by our example? It seems a very tight rope. On one hand you would like to. . .but on the other I feel we run the risk of hardening their hearts all the more by them interpreting it as self-righteousness and feeling justified to be angry at you. . .even though the only intention would be to help them so that they could share in the joy we have in our relationship with Jesus. I’d appreciate any thoughts you have on the subject. I really respect your column and words of wisdom. . .thank you.

Sheila

Answer: Dear Sheila,

Your question is a common one that Christians have – for we are blessed with the new life in Christ, and desire that everyone know and experience God as he has enabled us to. Yet many do not seem to care – or want to know.

The answer to your question is contained within your question – as you note that the things we say in attempting to help others come to Christ can be misinterpreted, as we therefore "run the risk of hardening their hearts all the more."

Sharing our faith is difficult – and so much more so because of those who, although zealous for Jesus Christ, have pushed their views on others, shoving their convictions down other people's throats. As a result, many today who need the gospel feel justified in rejecting the gospel, because of "self-righteous and hypocritical Christians" – they have a ready-made excuse not to listen.

In many cases we are better off winning those we love with whom we wish to share the gospel – winning them with our examples, not our talk. If our walk matches our talk – or even precedes our talk – them that example will indeed "speak louder than words." The old axiom is true – "sometimes the best sermons are the ones that are unspoken."

Hope this helps, Sheila – God bless.

In Christ,

Greg Albrecht