Question: Dear Greg,

I recently moved to a new city and state and I love it here. I’m on the verge of getting a good job. I have three kids ages 5, 3 and 14 months. I moved to get my kids in a safe environment. I can’t tell it all (the story is too long), but my kids were witness to someone else’s domestic violence situation. My eldest needs to be tested for ADHD, so his anger and acting out don’t make it easier for me or for my other two to get attention. I feel like everything is all piled up on me. I have to juggle my job, my kids, being in a new state (where I only know my boyfriend), and trying to figure where to start.

I really love my boyfriend but it is also on my mind that I know it’s a sin to live together when we are not married. I’m 26 and trying to be saved. I’m out of answers and need some help badly.

Heather

Answer:  Dear Heather,

You have real treasure—three children who are gifts from God. Perhaps the relationship with your boyfriend can turn into a commitment both of you will make to each other and to your children. The Bible does teach that the commitment of marriage offers the basis of sound family life and the basis of a home that can provide training and love for children. From the perspective of the Bible—which is the foundation of answers we at PTM offer—it is helpful to identify your priorities. Which comes first for you: what you believe on the basis of the Bible to be true and important, or something else? These are questions all of us need to ask ourselves on a regular basis.

All of us face important and critical decisions. Sometimes those decisions are more long-lasting than at other times. As we make those decisions, we need reliable, helpful, Christ-centered counsel from those we trust and look up to. You may need some support, some prayers and some friendships as you face some of these issues. One place to look is to a solid, Christ-centered, well-balanced church that places Christ at the center of its beliefs and that regards the Bible as the final basis of faith and practice. That would be a good place to start. Then ask those in such a place for their prayers and support as you face challenging decisions.

We here at PTM will pray for you and will be happy to continue helping you in answering questions and offering biblically based insight. May God bless you.

In Christ,

Greg Albrecht