Question:  Dear Greg,

            I started attending church services again after a long absence.  After I started attending, I prayed that my husband (who used to be a minister) would start attending church again too.  Well, God answered my prayers, but in his infinitely humorous way.  My husband started attending a different church than I do.  Now my husband wants us to start attending church “together”, with which I wholly agree.  However, he will not visit my church even though I have visited his several times.  I am not totally comfortable in his church.  I am still praying for a resolution to this new dilemma.

            What do you think?

            Zee

Answer:  Dear Zee,

            Yes, God has a sense of humor!  And yes, he often answers our prayers but not in the specific way and manner we requested!

            It is great that both you and your husband are attending church—providing it is a healthy, well-balanced and Christ-centered church.  But that’s not your question.

            Assuming both churches in question are biblically sound and Christ-centered, issues about which church is “better” or “superior” can become nothing more than denominationalism—a self-declared war on our part between one denomination and another.  On the other hand, as long as we see a church as our preference and not superior to others, there is nothing wrong about feeling more “at home” in one church.

            Two possible answers to your dilemma:

1.      Because one of the core doctrines of the Christian faith is the universal body of Christ and the fact that God is not captured or marketed by one specific denomination that has been founded and incorporated by humans means that Christians should be willing to attend another Christian church.  The first solution is that the two of you split your time equally between the two churches in question.  This would be biblical because in marriage we do not insist upon our way, but give, understand and try to meet halfway on such issues.  If that is not acceptable, then

2.      In a Christian marriage both partners honor the other and wish to serve the other.  Assuming you both accept the fact that the body of Christ is universal and assuming you reach a stalemate about both of your churches, then in the interests of your love for God and for one another, you could search for a mutually agreeable church that neither one of you attends at this time.

            In Christ,

            Greg Albrecht