Question: .

My wife is attending another church and it's put a bad strain on our marriage. To make matters worse, for nine months I was an over-the-road truck-driver and was seldom home. I love my wife very much. At times I feel as though I've put her in front of God. Several times I've attended her church so that we could at least see each other and have a some-what normal marriage. But, what usually happens is I get so frustrated at what they teach and say, I want to talk to her about it and we usually just get mad at each other and I know that's not the answer. We have a daughter and we both believe in our convictions, and I sometimes think that the proper thing to do for her (my daughter) sake is to just try to make things as stable for her as possible. My question is "should I give up on trying to make things better by doing things as attending her church when all it does is aggravate me to sit and listen to teaching that opposed my beliefs? I could use some advice and your prayers. Thanks in advance.

- Your friend, Dan

Answer:

Dear Dan,

Thanks for writing. You raise one of the more difficult questions, about one of the most perplexing marital situations. Inter-faith marriage is the broad term for what we are discussing.

I know you will understand when I say that I cannot give marriage advice via the internet, and that these remarks should not be understood as any more than broad principles. Marriage is important to God, and most churches encourage Christians to see devotion to one's spouse as more important than individual denominational differences. For example, there are happy marriages between Protestants and Catholics in N. Ireland - but to be fair, I believe religious differences add a high level of stress to such marriages that other marriages do not have to contend with - and no doubt many of these marriages suffer, and some fail as a result.

It is possible to put our spouse before God, as you say - but it is equally possible to let religious ideas (right or wrong, biblical or unbiblical) divide a marriage. Ironically, in some cases, it would be correct to say religious ideas, right or wrong, were put before God. You say that you love your wife - I hope that she has heard you say that recently. You love your wife, therefore it would seem that you want to rise above religious arguments that cause you both hurt and frustration. You might want to study - in depth - and meditate about - the principles found in Romans 14.

I will pray for you, and mention this situation to others asking for their prayers for you, your wife, and your daughter. If you feel that you would want your wife to read these comments (and yours) please feel free.

In Christ,

Greg Albrecht