Getting Old(er) – is Inevitable: Growing up – is Optional – Greg Albrecht

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One of my friends who is fighting the indignities and suffering some of the pains involved in aging (he is but one of many) asked me to write a prayer associated with aging. Writing prayers is not in my tool kit, but since I reluctantly identify with this stage of life, hoping that others might somehow benefit from my unpracticed efforts in writing a prayer, I told him I would, as the Brits say, have a go.

So, with thanks to my friend, with gratitude for thoughts about aging expressed by many others, as I get inexorably and uncomfortably closer to “celebrating” (is that the right word?) the BIG 8-0, here’s my first draft of an aging prayer.

Lord, as I get old(er) please help me to avoid being too grumpy. Remind me to talk less and listen more. Help me to avoid placing inordinate values on my own opinions. After all, I have had wrong-headed notions many times in my life, so more than a few erroneous perceptions may linger.

Most of all, dear Father in heaven, help me believe, know and trust that being “right” about facts and theories and dogmas are far less important than letting you love me. Gently nudge me, with your shepherd’s staff, away from the ditch of assuming the focus of my life is being “right” and help me focus on how I might love and serve others.

Grant me a release and full pardon from my efforts to fix people, my family, my friends; my neighbors and neighborhood; my state and my nation. Fill me with divine insight so I know I cannot, apart from you, fully straighten out my own life, much less the lives of others. Perhaps when I realize my efforts alone are incapable of changing who I am, nor can they change and fix others, then I might be more able to just love them, and by loving others in and by the grace of God, some, including myself, might be more inclined to let God love, change, fix and transform them.

May I be more thoughtful and more caring. Keep me mindful that old age is no guarantee that one might not find new ways to be stupid. May I focus more and more on Jesus than earthly worries and concerns. May I be encouraging rather than preachy … for as you know I hope to have a few friends left at the end.

This first draft of my aging prayer sent me on a journey of remembering others who have expressed objections, resistance toward and grievances against aging.

First drafted in 1947, the year of my birth, Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night is an oft cited short, poetic, literary sketch — by Welsh poet Dylan Thomas. Thomas directed his thoughts about death on behalf of his father who was fighting to remain alive, encouraging him: “Do not go gentle into that good night, old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage, against the dying of the light.”

My dear mother-in-law Joan, was a prim and proper English woman. She rarely used colorful language (around me, at least) or contemporary expressions. But as she started to of necessity deal with the many hurts, pains, losses and indignities of life, she memorably once said, “Don’t get old Greg. It sucks.”

Here are a few more wise perceptions from a wide spectrum of authors who say things far more eloquently and succinctly than I do:

• “If asked whether I am going gently into old age, I would answer, ‘No.’ If asked whether I am finally letting God love me, just as I am, I would answer, ‘No, but I’m trying.” – Brennan Manning
• “Nothing so dates a man as to decry the younger generation.” – Adlai Stevenson
• “I promised to keep on living as though I expected to live forever. Nobody grows old by merely living a number of years. People grow old only by deserting their ideals. Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up interest wrinkles the soul.” – Douglas MacArthur
• “You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.” – Bob Hope

Aging of course affords us a closer look, a front row seat into what lies beyond. Those of us who are classified as “seniors” often experienced diminished physical eyesight, but our spiritual vision of the finish line improves with each passing day. For a final thought in this brief reflection on aging, here is a description of the reception we shall receive in our heavenly home as imagined by Max Lucado, in a short piece he calls The Applause of Heaven.

• “You’ll be home soon, too. You may not have noticed it, but you are closer to home than ever before. Each moment is a step taken. Each day is a mile marked, a mountain climbed. You are closer to home than you’ve ever been.
• Before you know it, your appointed arrival time will come; you’ll descend the ramp and enter the City. You’ll see faces that are waiting for you. You’ll hear your name spoken by all those who love you. And maybe, just maybe – in the back, behind the crowds – the One who would rather die than live without you will remove his pierced hands from his heavenly robe and – applaud.”

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