Explaining “Sin” to Children – Brad Jersak

Question:

The word “sin” seems so loaded today, yet it’s hard to avoid using the word when talking to children or people new to Christian faith because it’s there in our Bibles. It’s even become a trigger word for many who might otherwise be open to Jesus. How would you address it?

Response:

You’re right—the English word “sin” has become a problem for several reasons. First, “sin” has been narrowed down and shallowed out to behaviors (though it does include that). And “sin” has accumulated an accusing-condemning tone in modern English that overreaches what the New Testament is doing, often feeding UN-Christlike religiosity and even driving people away from grace, rather than toward it.

Sin is also a complex word. We’ll get back to children in a minute, but first:

  • Sin as such is the spiritual disease of alienation that generates sinful behaviors. The behaviors are ‘sinful’ because of their roots in ‘sin.’
  • At one level, sin can be described “making bad choices and doing bad things,” but that description begs two questions: Why are these choices and actions bad? (I.e., what makes sin sin). And why do we make them? (We make them because of sin).
  • In that sense, moralism (and even right choices) doesn’t get to the root of sin or ultimately produce authentic repentance.
  • Paul says that kindness (Romans 2) and grace (Titus 2) are the solution (not the result) of our re-Turn to God.

For children or newcomers, then, it is perilous to use an archaic word like “sin” when it has been misused by moralists to condemn, beat down, or exclude the Other.

BUT… children (or grandchildren) will no doubt encounter the word “sin” in their churches, in their Bibles, and elsewhere. What to do? Here is how I would personally talk about “sin” when other language won’t do:

I. WHAT SIN ISN’T

Children, maybe you have heard the word “sin” before?

Can anyone tell me what you think that word means? [I would let them answer].

Do you see that there are a lot of ideas about sin? I think it will be best if we start with what “sin” does NOT mean.

Sin does not mean God doesn’t love you.

God always loves you, no matter what.

Sometimes if we hear that word, we get wrong ideas about God.

Always remember, God is love and God loves you.

Sin does not mean you are a bad person.

No. You are God’s child and God loves you very much.

Sometimes if we hear that word, we get wrong ideas about ourselves and others.

Always remember, you are loved, a very special child of God.

II. WHAT SIN DOES

Children, the word sin often describes the wrong choices and wrong actions we make.

But what makes a choice or action wrong? [let them answer]

Do you see that there are a lot of ideas about why “sin” is wrong?

I think we could say that choices and actions are wrong:

  • when we turn away from love—turning away from God’s love and turning away from loving others.
  • when we harm someone else with our choices or actions. That’s not love. That’s why “sin” is wrong.

But we don’t want to only ask what is wrong.

We want to ask what is right.

And Jesus tells us what is right in two ways.

  • Love God and love others as you love yourself—we call that “the great commandment.”
  • Do for others what you wish they would do for you—we call that “the golden rule.”

III. WHY DO WE SIN?

Some people say that “sin” is not only our wrong choices and wrong actions.

So, “sin” is also WHY we make those wrong choices and do those wrong actions.

Sin is not just breaking a law and God is not just a policeman or judge.

Sin is like a disease that needs a doctor.

And our sinful actions are like the symptoms of the disease.

Imagine there’s a virus in you that makes you smell bad or throw up or get grumpy.

It’s not enough to put on perfume, stop throwing up, or trying to be more cheerful.

We have to deal with the disease. We have to be healed.

So what is the germ of sin?

[Here I want to get at the root of sin—“alienation”… but how do we explain that to a kid?]

I think the sin virus is when we don’t feel loved by God or by others or by ourselves.

Whenever we feel alone and think no one can love us, we don’t need to be punished. That doesn’t help. We need to be loved.

When we don’t feel loved, when we don’t feel close and connected, we have a choice: we can turn toward love or turn away from love.

So often, people who feel unloved and turn away from love and make bad choices or do bad things. They act selfishly and even cause other people or themselves harm.

But Jesus says, “re-Turn” (in older English, we said “repent” but that is the same thing). Jesus says, “Come home to God’s house and God’s love and to the people who show God’s love.”

[Here is a good place to share the Parable of the Prodigal Son].

And sometimes, people who turn away from love get very lost, like a sheep that falls into a ditch and gets tangled in blackberry thorns. Re-Turning is not so easy. But what would you do if you were tangled like that?

[Let them answer. Hopefully someone suggests, “Call for help.” Then share the parable of the Lost Sheep].

When we’re so tangled that we can only call for help, Jesus says he will come find us and take us on his shoulders all the way home.

If the big problem with “sin” is turning away from love, let’s take time now to turn to God and to each other.

Exercise:

Let’s hold open our hands to release our frustrating or alone feelings to God.

Let’s let him take our bad choices and bad actions and send them far away.

Let’s keep our hands open and received God’s love.

Now let’s hold that love in our hands up to our heart.

Let’s imagine God holding them and speaking kindly to us.

Let’s let God heal us of our sin.

Now let’s turn to one another and love each other with words or hugs that heal their hearts.

Having thought about how we might speak of “sin” to children or others who don’t understand that word, can we all see where parts of our own heart need to be retrained, especially where toxic religion has used “sin” as a bludgeon rather than a first step to grace? Let’s all hear the love of God with the hearts of children, knowing that God’s first and last word to us is love.

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