When God is Silent – by Bermie Dizon

Not very many people know that there was a time in my life when I lost my voice for almost three months. No matter how hard I tried, no sound came out of my mouth. This happened in January 1989.

As a pastor, you can imagine how crucial my voice was to my ministry. Through preaching, teaching, mentoring, and comforting, I served. During the first month of having no voice, I struggled deeply. People would ask me questions, and I had to write my responses on a pad of paper—there was no texting back then! It tested my patience and became a profound journey of learning what it means to wait on the Lord.

What made it even worse was when a doctor, after examining my throat, told me that I might have cancer. A second opinion from another doctor confirmed the same suspicion, which left me terrified. However, a third doctor said that I would get better. I chose to believe the third doctor!

Yet, by the second month, I still had no voice. Frustrated, I wrote a letter to my supervisor offering my resignation, explaining that I could not fulfill my duties as a pastor without a voice. He responded with encouragement and simply said, “Be patient and wait on the Lord.”

By the third month, my feelings of helplessness grew. I questioned how I could fulfill my calling if I couldn’t speak. But it was in this silence that God began to teach me invaluable lessons about His power and my dependence on Him. I realized that my voice, while important, was not the only way God could work through me.

During those quiet months, I found new ways to connect with my church family. I listened more intently, prayed more deeply, and discovered God’s presence in the stillness. Interestingly, my inability to speak became an opportunity to hear God’s voice more clearly. Sometimes, silence is God’s answer, but it never means He has abandoned us. In His silence, I learned to wait and trust in His love.

Isaiah 40:31 reminds us that those who wait on the Lord will renew their strength. During my silence, God renewed me in unexpected ways—providing physical rest, spiritual rejuvenation, and emotional healing. My strength didn’t come from my ability to speak, but from God’s sustaining grace.

Without my voice, I had to rely on other forms of communication. This opened my eyes to the various ways God speaks to us—through His Word, through the quiet whisper of the Holy Spirit, and through the actions and words of others. Additionally, my inability to speak allowed others to step up and take leadership roles, including one man who would go on to become the National Director in the Philippines and Superintendent of Missions in Asia.

Waiting on the Lord requires faith and patience. This period of silence tested my trust in God’s timing and plan. I had to surrender my need for control and lean into His promise that He is always working for our good, even when we cannot see it. Three months later, during Holy Week, my voice finally returned.

If you are in a season of waiting or silence, remember that God is with you. He is faithful. He is renewing your strength, teaching you new things, and deepening your faith. Trust in His timing and embrace the quiet moments, for it is often in the silence that we hear His voice most clearly.

Excerpted from “God In Every Step” available now at Amazon.com. Bermie Dizon is a husband, father, grandfather and retired pastor living in Southern California.