Q & R: Baptism and the fate of the ‘unprepared’ – Brad Jersak

Question: If I found myself numb with pain, injured and bleeding in the cold on a cloudy day, having never been baptized for whatever reason(s), and therefore not "OFFICIALLY" in the Body of Christ as I died. Being lifelong mostly homeless, reality itself seemed to communicate to me "authoritatively" that my death and eternal punishment were now imminent? Would I have reason to quiver convulsively in deep and dreadful fear?  To add a little humor, if I were dying in those circumstances, could I say a few words then spit on myself and confidently count it baptism? Thus, I'm in! But what if I were unconscious? I know these "unprepared ...